Chemo Round 3 + A Letter to My CrossFitters from your Favorite Breast Cancer Patient

Here is a photo of the alien coming out of
my skin (aka the port).

Prelude to Round 3: Port Surgery
Each time I go in for chemotherapy, I have to get lab work done so they can review my white blood cell counts to make sure they are high enough to go for another round without added risk of infection, and look at other indicators like red blood cell counts. On round 2, we were going in for labs and instead of the usual 15-20 minutes of getting the IV and the blood draws, it took a whole hour to find a suitable vein. They claim my veins are "smart" because they know to avoid the needles, but in reality they are just a pain because it meant getting poked 3 different times in 3 different areas, leaving me bruised and battered all over my left arm.

At that time, they recommended I get a port, which is an alien-like device placed under the skin in my upper left chest area, with a direct line to my jugular vein. They can stick needles into the port and always find a good vein, and it only takes about 1 minute to get it done. The surgery was an outpatient procedure, performed by the same surgeon who did my mastectomy (a good-natured fellow, Dr. Ed Nelson) who promised he would keep his hand steady when he cut into the jugular vein. How reassuring. The port proved to be a tremendous benefit when I went in for the labs on Round 3, taking just a couple of minutes and leaving me with no additional needle pokes on my ravaged arm.

Round 3: December 17
Then on Tuesday I went in for round 3 of chemotherapy, out of a total of 8 rounds that I have scheduled. On round 5 we switch up the meds, so this was actually 75% of the way through my current chemo medications. I've come to the conclusion that I am either:

(1) Very lucky to escape most of the bad side effects, or
(3) Genetically awesome when it comes to resisting chemo side effects
(Honestly I don't care which it is, I'll take either)

Here is my best shaved-head selfie. I'm really
not that good at taking selfies.

I have had some nausea, but it's easy to control with the medication they give me, and the only other noticeable side effects have been some heartburn (also easy to control with a prescription), and some fatigue (easy to control by sleeping more and skipping work).

I did find out in this most recent lab work that I am slightly anemic, which means I have lower-than-optimal red blood cell count, and also explains why I have been so winded when I go back to workout at CrossFit (it can't be that I took 2 months off and have been eating a terrible diet around the holidays, can it? Nah, I'm sure it's the anemia).

Overall, rounds 2 and 3 have so far been very similar to round 1. I did begin losing some of my hair after round 2, and promptly shaved my head. Of course, as soon as I shaved it, the hair stopped falling out, so now I just have a shaved head of stubble. It's a little patchy, and VERY cold (I had no idea how much heat my hair was holding in), so I supplement with some awesome wigs my cousin gave me and a few hats to keep warm.

A Letter to My CrossFit People
Note: I'm writing this about CrossFit, but generally speaking, you could substitute the idea of fitness throughout, so you can read this even if you don't do CrossFit. Or you could try CrossFit because it's awesome. 

As I was sitting at the chemotherapy infusion center on Tuesday for my third round of chemotherapy (out of 8 total), I was browsing through pictures of some amazing athletes at CrossFit Timpanogos, and I was inspired to write you a little note. Some of you have seen me there recently, after I finally got clearance from the reconstructive surgeon to go back to working out and lifting weights, albeit lighter weights than before (as an added bonus, I've gotten to make some new friends when I do the Fitness WODs instead of Performance). It has been great to be back, even if I am a little out of shape.

When we talk about CrossFit, we often say that it prepares you for "the unknown and the unknowable", and as I was sitting through the chemotherapy infusion, it made me think about how completely out of the blue (the very manifestation of unknown and unknowable) this cancer diagnosis has been.

At the same time, I realized how much CrossFit has done for me to prepare me for this challenge. I can honestly say that I am a different person now than when I first walked into Cache Valley Strength & Conditioning four years ago, and CrossFit Timpanogos 3-1/2 years ago. The workouts that we do every day have not only made me physically strong (which I believe is helping me get through chemotherapy and all these surgeries a little easier), they have made me mentally tough too. The ability to power through a CrossFit WOD, your whole body screaming at you to please stop, then to find the strength to keep pushing through until you have accomplished your goal is a a tremendous benefit in this fight with cancer or any challenge in life.

Plus the people at CrossFit Timpanogos, and friends from other gyms, have provided me with much-needed emotional support through this whole ordeal, like a cheerleading squad behind me the whole time. The highlight of my days is walking into the gym to see all your smiling faces (even if those smiles do turn to agony-filled faces as the WOD progresses), to get hugs and words of encouragement, to hear how you are doing, and to hear your inspiring stories of you and your loved ones who are survivors just like me.

I have also been thinking about some of you who I haven't seen at CrossFit in a while (I won't name any names, although some of you have personally confessed to me that you've been slacking lately, so you know who you are). I can totally sympathize with you on how easy it can be to fall into a habit of not showing up at the gym, and maybe it is even for very valid reasons. But the reality is that there are so many things that you are getting when you DO show up for the workouts, whether it's achieving your goal of losing weight and getting healthier, being able to chase your kids around at the park instead of being out of breath the whole time, or even being strong enough to get through a fight with a disease like cancer or another big challenge in your life.

If you haven't been to a WOD in a while, I challenge you to join me back at the gym. Don't wait for the new year to come back (believe me, there's nothing magical about the date of January 1 that is going to change your motivation level). Come back today. Or tomorrow. Or the next day. Just come back. If it seems hard, just think about how much I want to see you there, and how much I miss you. Not just me either--I think I could speak for all the coaches and your fellow CrossFitters when I say that we all miss you.

I truly love all of you, and appreciate the support and encouragement you provide me with every day. I look forward to seeing you at the gym soon!

P.S. If you're reading this and you don't go to CrossFit, (1) what is wrong with you? It's the best workout you will ever get in your life, so you should join, and (2) feel free to join us any time at CrossFit Timpanogos in Lehi. Your first 3 classes are free!